Friday, June 10, 2011

God's Works, Our Play

On May 22nd, my godfather was called from this life into the next after a gruelling battle with cancer. His was more than my godfather, he was my father for a number of years. I grew up under his roof. He is great man. His friends and family can attest to that. He always worked hard, smiled lots and was a great role model.

Sometimes in life things don't exactly work out as you planned. God has other plans. My godfather's death was one of those things. Living so far away from family is harder when someone passes. We knew he was battling cancer, but never thought that his passing would come so suddenly or quickly. It takes a lot of money to travel back home. It is over 1800 miles from here. When my brother called and said that Pat (my godfather) only has a few days tops, I knew I had to book a flight to see him before he passed.

That night, I got off the phone and was sad, frustrated, and felt hopeless. I knew that we were desperately trying to stay debt-free, but really wanted to go. I knew that all of our savings were going towards a renovation that we had long saved up for and that was to begin the very next day. My husband and I talked and talked about the situation. I knew that I had to be there. I knew that we were about to incurr a debt greater than we were ready to accept. Minutes later, I was on the phone with the airline and told them I needed to fly home asap.

Two and a half weeks later, I still feel the sting of it all. Why can't I just get over it. Other people take out loans for cars, vacations and stuff. I want' to live simply. How does debt fit into the picture? I guess I have come to deal with the fact that it was this way for a reason. We will pay off the debt and it will be forgotten.

I said at the beginning that it was God's work. I flew home the next day, four kids in tow. I was too late. My godfather passed while I was booking the flight. The week was spent getting ready for the wake and funeral. I saw so many people that I hadn't seen in 15 to 20 years. I saw my brother, my neice and nephew, my dad, my mom and friends that I hadn't seen in a very long time. I thought that we were going to a great person in his final days, go to a funeral and be so busy that we wouldn't have time to really have fun. I didn't expect to have any fun.

I had two of the best weeks in my life on our short visit. I connected with people that I never expected to connect with. I spent time with the dearest of friends. I gained a new perspective on life. I prayed more. I thanked more. I loved more. I could never have done all this without God's help. God knew that I needed someone to mother me for a few weeks and he provided. He knew that I was at the end my rope with the way we have to eat, but he provided relief. He knew that my kids needed true friends and He gave them that. He knew that we needed to be there. I followed his lead and took a leap of faith. Now I am called to live more simply and He provided the tools. These two weeks gave me things that I never even asked for. God is so good.

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